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Year I disappear

Blessed and other scary stuff

You can be thankful for many things, and scared also. I am those and the whole ball of wax. Let's work it backwards okay?

Thank you to the nice CSR from Verizion. Yes, you read that correctly. A Customer Service Rep that was NICE. Her name is Renee. She was sweet, polite and helpful. Can't go wrong with that at 8:15 on a Saturday morning.

Craigslist: Who would have thought you could get a top of the line, and I do mean A ... Top ... Of ... the... Line ... Washing Machine off Craigslist for hardly anything. To the woman who sold it to us, Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I do not know your situation, you looked terrified, I hope the money will help you. I called the manufacture and was able to get the full 7 year warranty on the motor and lifetime warranty on the drum. WOOT!
A matching dryer is being picked up near Fort Drum today from a Solider who came home from Germany and has no room for it in his house. It is brand new, in his storage unit on base. Packed up by the Army. Thank you for coming home safe.

Still sick. Simple as that. Many factors.
~ My right hand is shot from the dog bite last fall. I am told there is permeant damage in it. Lacing corsets and sewing was awful. Holding a fork lots of times can be a problem. Maybe in another six months or a year it will be easier I hope.
~ There is a serious systemic yeast infection. Breathing is tight. Ears hurt. Mouth, Tongue and throat hurts skin is just gross in spots. The GP put me on Diflucan the Wednesday before faire ended. That was August 15th. That threw my body into a full blown Steven-Johnson Reaction. Three hours after taking the Diflucan the horrible itching and dizziness started. Still getting on and off low grade fevers. It's been a month since taking the pill. The last time that I had a Steven-Johnsons reaction to a drug it was 7 month recovery period. I am literally praying that because my diet is so much better now than it was then that I will not go though the skin necroses like I did the last time. Because truly *that* is terrifying. Trying to explain to people that you are allergic to antibiotics to this degree. Most of the time they do not believe me. I did go to the ER friday after taking the pill. The Doctor there confirmed that I was having Steven-Johnsons Syndrome Reaction. And to just do what I normally would do for it. Gave me medicine for the pain which I have used sparingly and have followed up with the GP who ran a corse of steroids which I don't think did squat. I've been using Benadryl when thing become too much to bear and zinc oxide. I wish that I could just tear all my skin off, my eyes, ears, even my teeth. Reach deep inside to my lungs and rinse them so well with saline give them a good scrub. If I could..... But then again if I could, there would be a unicorn outside for my dreams. a beautiful black one.

~ I have Lyme. Guess how it is normally treated? Antibiotics. I have been going to my Chiropractor for adjustments to help with everything. He is my blessing. I have been losing my eye site all summer as far as reading. This could be due to the Lyme. I am not sure. I had just gotten new glasses last autumn. But blind as a bat sums it up quite well. So this forces me to actually rest when I am exhausted. Not an easy thing for me. For those that really know me, know that I get to the point of tears when I am beyond tired. When I have gone just too far, I love pushing myself. I haven't been able to this past month :/ My workouts have been tiny, limited and at home. But at least I am still doing them.

Pandora: What a wonderful thing this is! Thank you Ralph for introducing me it. I love it so much. <3

Random thought as I write this entry: many of the words in here as I run it through spell check still look wrong to me. Is it the computer or my brain? This is happening more and more often. So very frustrating.

Comments

Wow, that really sucks. My boyfriend's mother died from Steven-Johnson's Syndrome, so I know that stuff's no joke.

I *truly* hate doctors that don't believe their patients. Been there, done that, it really blows.

I'm sorry all this is going on. I hope it gets better (or at least bearable) soon. (((hugs)))
Thank you. I hope you are doing all right. I think of you often.
Things aren't too bad actually. I have a meeting tomorrow with an intake person from another housing program. Still within East House, but with more independence, more rent assistance, and I'm not mandated so many meetings a month with a counselor. From a mental health prospective, things are looking ok.

From a physical perspective however, they suck. I'm in another round of physical therapy for a knee that I've resigned myself to the fact that it's probably going to bother me for the rest of my life. Chronic pain sucks, especially when it's in multiple areas of your body (and no one will prescribe powerful enough medications to do anything about it).
Yep, I got you on that. I go to my chiropractor when i can get enough money together to pay for it to help with the pain. It does help when I can go. But he is a very good chiropractor not one of those that just snap your spine.

I am just tired of being sick. Tired of every day being asked "Are you better today?" "Is it over yet?"